One of my biggest struggles is with pride. Pride shows itself in my (attempts at) perfectionism, and when it’s not contained, I feel invincible: I don’t need God or anyone to help me. I can do my work — and God’s work for me — on my own. I’ve got it all figured out, or so I mislead myself into thinking.
Inevitably, I fall on my face — something I’ve been doing a lot lately.
This season I’m in — at home, with 3 kids under age 6, about to have child#4 any day, homeschooling, weary, exhausted — has revealed to me how truly needy and weak I am. I really have nothing to boast about.
Yet, Satan always finds a little carrot to dangle over my head. He lures me into thinking I’m strong enough to do all I need to do on my own — without the One who is my source of life and strength.
And we all know how this story ends: with a broken woman down on her knees — right where I belong.
From this vantage point, I am able to see that I am in constant need . . .
of kind words
Nothing I do is about me; it’s about God working in me. It’s God carrying out His will for me, in His strength, in His power. And when I let that perfect power rest on me, His will is accomplished.
When I resist, thinking I can do it better on my own, then, once again, I fall flat on my face. Like a child refusing her mother’s hand as she climbs down the stairs, in my own strength, I refuse my Father’s open hands. And when I do, I fall, I get bruised, scraped up, and disappointed.
“But He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:9-10
In this season, I’m learning how much I must depend on God. When I do, it’s beautiful. My faith in Him increases, my worries and doubts fly away, and my need to be perfect disappears. I suddenly have energy to play with my girls, despite my 39 weeks of pregnancy. Patience and kindness exude from me, despite lack of sleep. Not because of me, but because of God working in me.
Lord, I submit my life — with all my worries and fears, all my doubts and cares, all my feelings of “not-good-enough,” all my pain and sorrow — to You. In humility, I see joy in my weak state, and I am glad that when I am weak, I don’t have to be strong because You are my strength. Thank You, O Lord my Rock and my Redeemer. Amen.
If you feel weak today, boast in it. Not that you have the strength to overcome, but that your God will provide exactly what you need. His power will be made perfect in your weakness. Let His power rest on you today. It is more than enough.